The life I live is full of struggle yet strength
Israel's constant attack and control buds tension
The fire burns within me to make them pay
The realization of what i must do was blunt in front of me
The smell of sweat and dust burned in my nostrils
I kept my eyes closed I had to focus-
I couldn't bare to see the families, the innocence
I had to remember my purpose, my paradise
I grasped for my bag, my hands beginning to sweat
The strap felt like a ball of fire, full of power, my own power
The doubt swirling in my mind flushed out
I would die a martar and prove to the Islams they had no right
I clicked the button awaiting the innocent-
Screams...just silence, it was done
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jenna i really like how you set the scene with your first stanza. the rest of your poem really makes me feel like i am there. i can visualize the image and the event of being a suicide bomber. good job. :)
ReplyDeleteJenna, i really liked your poem. it painted a great picture and it seemed like a suicide bombers thoughts. Good use of suicide bombers beliefs.
ReplyDeleteJenna, I really like your poem, especially the last stanza. It gave a lasting image to the poem and ended it on a really strong note. The whole thing had great imagery and tone. I agree with Jackson, it sounded like real thoughts going through a suicide bombers head before the bomb. Lovely job!
ReplyDeletethe last two lines in this poem are very effective in drawing the reader in and making a personalm connection. good attention to detail and attention to emotion
ReplyDeleteJenna, I really like the line "The smell of sweat and dust burned in my nostrils." Great sensory imagery. I also liked the last few lines; it was a powerful ending to your poem. You could work on line breaks...maybe making the first two stanzas 5 or 6 lines long instead, also watch for typos like "buds tension" and "martar." I was wondering if this was written from a Jewish bomber's perspective because of the line "prove to the Islams [muslims] they had no right."
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